The Heart's A Fickle Thing
by EW4eva
Summary: Faye Donovan faces a scarred past, and a scary future. Everything she once knew and loved has been taken from her and there is no where to turn, except Hogwarts, her old school which she had to leave in third year. Can she restart where she left off?
1. Escape

Title: The Heart's a Fickle Thing

Chapter 1: Escape

"You know you can't run," a sick and disturbing voice called after her, "Even if you could, you would have no where to go."

Faye Donovan turned slowly on her heel, her long black hair swished lightly like a rouge wave as it lapped against her extremely thin figure. She stared deep loathing daggers with her violently sharp blue eyes that would have pierced her fathers' soul if he had one.

"I am not your little puppet. You cannot and you will not control me anymore! I'm finished with you," Faye said as she drew her wand and pointed it steadily at the man who had destroyed all she knew. Her face was set and defiant; her pale skin only made her expression more prominent and powerful.

However, Rufus Donovan, a simply dressed, yet very elaborate male in his fifties could not be intimidated by a seventeen year old, let alone his daughter. He looked down at the wand with a placid grin, "Are you going to kill me?" he asked coolly, letting out a smooth yet cruel laugh. Faye felt a shiver run down her spine, but she remained calm, her hand clenched tighter around her only weapon.

Rufus made his way over to the table in the center of the room. They were in a musty old house that appeared to be decaying from the inside. The living room in which they were standing was dark; the raggedy curtains were shut tightly against the nighttime summer sky to keep unwanted eyes from peering in, if there were any. The lived out in the middle of nowhere, with more enchantments on their house than imaginable. The only thing that surrounded them were open green hills from the front, and woods around the rest. No one could find them unless they were suppose to.

"You are just like your mother," his eyes glinted with an unknown malice, "Making so much racket and never having the ability to go through with any of your stupid plans. You're weak, just like she was. Bless the Dark Lord she's gone."

Faye felt a rage growing within her body, her hand began to tremble. This only coaxed the man to continue, "You need discipline Faye. I thought you learned it, but this proves me wrong. The Dark Lord will not want you like this."

"He is NOT my Lord," Faye was now shaking because of the words spoken by the one who had made her life hell. Bringing her mother into it was one thing, but adding Voldemort was another.

Her father snorted at this, "He is, whether you like it or not. He _chose_ you, and there is no way to escape him. Even if you kill me, he WILL find you."

"No!" Faye cracked, everything she had been taught, everything she had learned flew out the window at that moment. She was not even aware of what she was doing. "I will escape you; I will escape both of you! Crucio!"

Rufus Donovan cried in anguish. His body doubled over in pain. When the enormous amount of pain ceased he looked up slowly from his crumpled form on the floor and… and laughed. "Like father, like daughter, I'm proud."

Fury was burning inside her. It did not seem as if the curse was coming from her lips, "Crucio!"

Another shriek of pain. Faye stood motionless; she would not let the tears come. This was not the time. One thing her father did teach her was to never show any emotion, or if you must, never show anything but collectiveness towards your enemy.

"You plan to torture me a bit before you do me off? Clever girl. You're not as stupid as I always imagined. The Dark Lord will be pleased when he finds out. My passing will indeed be met with regret, but he will still be pleased. When he finds you, let him know that I lived to serve."

"Crucio!"

It took a few more minutes for him to speak, this time in a more pathetically weak tone: "Get it done with girl! You've had your fun," he glanced up at me. His expression seemed to instantly change from pain to amusement as a chuckle escaped his lips. "You're too afraid! I should have known. You've always been a worthless piece of shit!"

He grabbed onto the table next to him, and heaved himself up, and began to move towards her. Faye automatically stepped back. No one would come in to save her. From the outside, the house was deadly silent due to all the charms, not a soul could hear the ear-piercing screams from within.

"You almost fooled me," he said in a heavy tone, limping slightly as he made his way closer and closer, "but you're not ready. Maybe with a bit more time… yes. Imperio!"

"Protego!" Faye shouted quickly in defense. The Imperius Curse ricochet off the shield, smashing the wooden kitchen door. She would not let him get her. She wanted to be free; to smell free air; to escape!

Rufus Donovan howled menacingly, laughing at the beauty of the situation. "A spell worthy of your mother! That stupid mudblood, I was a fool in my younger days… I should have listened to all those sane souls around me saying she was nothing but a filthy, ugly excuse for a witch."

She looked once towards the thick metal door that led down to the basement. Her place of hell. She would not go back; she couldn't.

"I'm sorry Father… Avada Kadavra!"

Silence.

Faye moved quickly, gathering everything useful she could find. Money, clothes, food… someone would come. They always did to check up on things. If any of the Dark Lord's servants found her, it would be over. She would be locked away again, until it was time. She had to leave now!

She ran through the house, picking up what she needed, and shoving it forcefully into her trunk. She never looked down at the body lying motionless on the living room floor. Tears were rolling down her cheeks freely as she rushed around. She did not attempt to stop them, choosing to push all thoughts out of her head instead. Trying to cease them would only mean bringing on more. She had no time to cry.

A rustling was heard from outside. Faye halted in mid-step, her heart beat was racing. A slow knock came at the door. She felt dizzy, they were here. She raced to her trunk, and hurriedly shoved all the rest of the contents inside. They couldn't hear her, but they would not wait long before breaking the door down.

Another knock came, this time much heavier. They fiddled with the door knob to try to get entrance. She stood up after slamming the trunk closed, and pointed her wand at it, shrinking it so it could be placed easily into her pocket.

Someone was now hammering on the door, making it rattle in its frame. She ran. Through the kitchen and to the back door. As she opened it, she heard a smashing from behind her. She didn't hesitate, without looking back she ran from the house, not bothering to close the door, it would make too much noise. She heard a shout from within the house, they found the body. She felt the grass crunch beneath her feet as she was now sprinting for the woods, it took her only another few seconds before she entered the edge. She ducked behind a tree. But it was too late. They were shouting at her to stop. A spell grazed her left shoulder, forcing her to yelp in pain, but she didn't even glance at it. Ignoring the searing pain she closed her eyes tightly, trying to imagine a place to go.

A faint pop could be heard as she disappeared.


	2. The Leaky Cauldron

Title: The Heart's a Fickle Thing

Chapter 2: The Leaky Cauldron

With a soft pop, Faye found herself standing in a very dark alley way, looking around she couldn't see anyone. She walked slowly and cautiously to the end of the alley, where it met the street. Peering around the decaying wall Faye noticed only one person, a homeless man fast asleep on the steps of the church across. She hurried around the corner where she was met with the rather ugly entrance of the Leaky Cauldron.

Looking up at the sign hesitantly, Faye was rather worried that she wouldn't be able to get a room at half-past one in the morning. Plus she hadn't talked to more than five people in the last four years. Throwing away her concerns, she walked over to the door and pushed it open, being met by the sight of several overly-drunk witches and wizards laughing and dancing to music coming from… who knows where?

She stood in the doorway for a minute, motionless, staring at the scene around her. A rather old man noticed her, and with a drunken chuckle he came over and grabbed her by the waist and attempted to dance with her. Frightened, Faye pulled out her wand and was about to shout a curse when a slightly younger man came over to her, and pulled him off.

"Sorry about that Dearie," He said motioning towards the man who was now dancing with himself, a dreamy look plastered on his face.

Faye nodded in reply.

"What is a young lassie like you doing in here so late?" He asked and noticing her hesitation added, "I'm Tom the bar and innkeeper. What can I do for ya?"

Faye instantly straightened up, and in a business-like tone replied: "I require a room for the next three days, sir."

"Oh, I see!" The man said brightly, "Right this way…"

Faye followed him from the dimly lit bar to a much brighter little office where Tom closed the door behind them, blocking out all the noise as if someone had pushed mute. However Faye didn't really take the time to notice this and the possibility of a silencing charm because she had to quickly shut her eyes due to the lighting in this room. When she opened them again, squinting, she saw a desk crammed to one side, one seat behind it, and one in front. The chairs were rather nice mahogany (she assumed), the only nice articles in the room. There were two file cabinets to the side, a few drawers were open and there were papers everywhere. There was also a rack of key hooks on the wall behind the desk. Out of the thirty or so, only six were left.

"Now," Tom said, taking the seat behind the desk. He motioned for her to take the opposite chair; she did. "You say you want a room for three nights eh? The rates a galleon two knuts a night, three will make it 3 galleons 6 knuts total…" His expression changed for a moment as he adopted a suspicious glare, "I _assume_ you have money…"

Faye nodded, and he gained a happy grin once more. "Right then, if you be so kind as to pay now, then I'll take you up to your room!"

Faye handed over the gold and bronze coins, and after counting them, they both stood up. Tom went to the key rack and picked up the key for room #14. He led the way, out of the office, back into the noisy bar, and up the rickety but fancy staircase; all the way to room #14.

Faye expected him to just leave her there, or at least that was what she was _hoping_ he would do. Saying she wasn't a people-person was putting it lightly. Tom proceeded to place the key in the keyhole and open the door for her. She stepped in to the adequate room. The walls were plain white, with a bed on one side of the room, and a dresser on the other. Across from her was a small but decent window that showed the shops below, and a desk situated right in front of it. The floor was wooden, but there was a circular rug to spare most of it. There was also a small fireplace close to the bed, which was crackling merrily.

Faye sighed and sank heavily into the hard desk chair, waiting for the man to leave so she could finally fall asleep.

He smiled brightly at her, after noticing her exhaustion he spoke, "Well, if there is anything, and I mean ANYTHING you need, don't hesitate to ask!" With that he shut the door behind him tightly and left her in peace. Groggily, she stood up, taking the miniature trunk from her pocket and resizing it. Not bothering to change her dirty, sweaty clothes she fell right on top of the bed, forgetting to pull away the covers, and fell instantly asleep.

Faye Donovan awoke to the chirping of birds. Groaning, she pulled herself out of the comforting bed. There were many pluses and minuses to being a light sleeper. Plus: you could hear whenever an enemy was coming. Minus: You can't sleep past six or seven.

She looked at the clock on the desk, something she had missed last nigh- earlier this morning. In this case it was seven thirty, lucky her, she slept in! Rummaging through her trunk, she came across a few cloth items she had managed to find in her hurry. Seeing as her father had been a pureblood, they usually only wore robes, but she managed to find a few muggle things of her mothers that had been hidden away.

She took out the flowery blue and white blouse and stared hesitantly at it for a moment, and then looked down at the other tops, jeans and skirts. She didn't really know why she took them. She came across the cardboard box when she was thirteen, right after… Well, she just couldn't leave them behind.

Pushing them aside in her trunk, she pulled out two sets of robes. One were her old school robes. They definitely wouldn't fit her anymore. It wasn't that they were too small, well around the waist at least. She used to be a lot chubbier, but lack of food to what would soon be a naturally thin frame caused her excessively skinny self to throw the robes aside after taking one last look at the red and gold Gryffindor badge. She then picked up her regular black robes, which were much longer and fit for her. She was quite tall for a female her age, but not overly; just a few inches above the average seventeen year old girl. Lost in thought of the night before, Faye grabbed her robes, and went in search of a bathroom.


	3. A Meeting With the Headmaster

Title: The Heart's a Fickle Thing

Chapter 3: A Meeting with the Headmaster

Faye Donovan walked back to her room, fully cleaned and dressed, and headed over to her trunk. Grabbing a blank sheet of parchment, a few other papers with test results, ink, and a quill, she straightened and walked over to the desk, placing the items down neatly and taking a seat. After a quick glance out of the window in front of her into the bright, sunny street of Diagon Alley, she turned to her parchment and began to write:

_Dear Headmaster Albus Dumbledore,_

_I am writing you on this day to request a private audience with you within the next two days to discuss my possible return to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. My father, Mr. Rufus Donovan, has kept me well trained in the art of witchcraft. I enclose various results: O.W.L.s, and major exams for different courses. Please inform me if this meeting is possible._

_Thank you,_

_Faye Donovan _

Faye looked the letter over twice before nodding approvingly and sealing it. She then sat in concentration and muttered a tricky spell she had learned from a decrepit book on a shelf in her old home.

The letter disappeared with a small snap. Sadly, no one taught this delivery spell anymore due to the enormous likelihood that the letter would get lost, or rather just disappear (it was a form of a vanishing spell) if the spell was not performed to its exact requirements. It took Faye four months to perfect it. Most people rather just rely on owls then having to go through the trouble of finding out if the recipient had received the letter, and if not then resending one.

Standing up, Faye gazed out of the window anxiously. There were so many happy faces waltzing around, some in robes, the rest in muggle clothing to "blend in" whilst in the streets of London. Faye knew she could freely walk around down in the streets below. Only four people knew about her ties to the Dark Lord: her father (now deceased), Serentius Malfoy, Yardale Flint (deceased, killed by the Dark Lord), and the Dark Lord.

The two goons, Crabbe and Goyle, who were at her house the previous night had been known to make regular check ups by order of the Dark Lord. Yet, before their eminent arrival each night at around eleven o'clock, Faye's father would always make sure she was securely locked in the basement with direct orders to remain quiet. It was always interesting to know that the Dark Lord kept the existence of Faye a secret from his followers. However, taking last night into account, it had to be assumed that two more people knew of her existence. And while this may seem to be a very dangerous situation, Faye knew that the two were wanted for the murder of three muggles: Dorin Kobori, Catalina Kobori, and Adriana Kobori after a raid in Romania.

So basically, she only had to look out for one person in Diagon Alley. However, the Dark Lord currently had a very important campaign, which Malfoy was a lead in. She doubted if he would be seen back in society for at least a month. And as far as the Dark Lord went, she seriously doubted to see him traipsing down the streets of London. Either way she wanted to remain close by in case Albus Dumbledore replied.

Faye's anxiousness melted into longing; She thrust the windows open, so the sounds of many happy witches and wizards, young and old, floated up to her level, and in a slightly intoxicating daze, she began to doze off into sweet oblivion.

Faye awoke abruptly to the sound of a pop, breaking the sweet even sound of the noises below. She stared around for a moment confused until her eyes noticed the letter lying neatly next to her. She had to give a faint chuckle at the fact there was no owl. Apparently, she wasn't the only one in the wizarding world who approved of quick responses.

Faye took a moment to stare at the neatly sealed envelope with its bright purple ink in elegant and loopy writing, appreciating its arrival. Then delaying no more time, she quickly tore it open.

_Ms. Donovan,_

_After looking over your information quite thoroughly I find it necessary to arrange a private meeting with you. While Hogwarts does not usually admit students after the first term of first year, I find this a unique case based on the fact that you are a returning student. That said, I would like to meet with you in my office at half past two. The floo network has been open to accommodate your arrival. If this time is in anyway unfeasible for you, please reply to this letter. If not, I look forward to seeing you in my office this afternoon._

_Sincerely,_

_Headmaster Albus Dumbledore _

Faye grinned at the positive response, then glanced at the clock. 2:08, she better get ready!

At 2:26 Faye headed down to find Tom to use the fireplace. He happily pointed her in the right direction, saying how pleasant it was to see her up and about. She nodded in reply and headed over to the fireplace, grabbing some of the floopowder that rested on the mantle she threw it into the flames, "Headmaster's Office, Hogwarts".

The flames turned green and she placed her foot into the glowing mass, feeling a cold tickle rather than a burning sensation. With a small pop she disappeared in the flames, feeling the whirling sensation as fireplace after fireplace blurred passed her vision. Closing her eyes she felt herself slow, and she grabbed onto the new mantle as she was hurled out.

"Nice to see you again, Ms Donovan!" A voice called brightly to her.

Faye opened her eyes to meet the gaze of Albus Dumbledore. He was exactly how she remembered: a small smile tucking away at his lips, behind a long, white beard, strangely shaped spectacles, and a twinkle in his eyes that never went out. He was wearing a rather elaborate set of purple robes that nicely suited him.

"Hello Headmaster," Faye responded curtly.

"Please, come sit!" he said enthusiastically, leading her over to one of two very plushy chairs in front of his desk. She did so, and to her surprise, Dumbledore, rather than taking the seat behind the desk, took the one next to her.

Discarding her astonishment, she addressed the Headmaster on the topic at hand.

"I have come to ask if I could return to Hogwarts," Faye said, trying to get onto this topic quickly.

"Yes, I'm very well aware. And I do have some questions for you," He turned his chair around more to face her. "First off, why the sudden interest to return? Your father was quite keen that you be home-schooled…"

Faye wasn't exactly sure how to answer this, "My mother always wanted me to learn at Hogwarts. My mother and father fought over it constantly when he took me out. But she died soon after, and he continued to school me." Faye purposely strayed from the topic of her father, "Now I wish to return for my final year to take my N.E.W.T.s. It was difficult to take my O.W.L.s the way I did."

"I see…" Dumbledore said, contemplating this, after a moment he spoke again, "And what of your father?"

I lowered my head in remorse and then responded quietly, "He's dead sir."

I looked up, and met Dumbledore's eyes. I could feel him trying to delve into my mind. I quickly pushed him out, turning away, and repeating more firmly, "He's **dead** sir."

Albus Dumbledore seemed mildly surprised, but he never faltered. "I see, and I am sorry for you loss." He paused for a moment, perhaps waiting for me to either nod my appreciation for the condolences or to turn my gaze back up at him. I gave him the pleasure of neither, however, and after a few moments, he continued. "Well Ms. Donovan, seeing as how you are of age we do not require a guardian to give permission for you to return. Also, your father appears to have kept up with your home-schooling quite intently. Given all this, I will gladly welcome you back for your final year. Your Head of House is still Professor McGonagall. You'll still be in Gryffindor, for I find no need to resort you. Once the Sorting Hat has made up its mind, it has made up its mind…"

Faye pondered this for a moment remembering back to her first year.

"_Donovan, Faye," Called McGonagall from the large scroll._

_Faye quickly scurried up to the hat, glancing at the tattered thing once before picking it up and placing it onto her raven black hair. The short and slightly stout girl of eleven sat, waiting for something to happen._

"_Ah... a Donovan," Faye visibly jumped, nearly falling off her stool. _

"_A bit clumsy I see… Hufflepuff perhaps? Hmmm. No, I don't think so. Not much like your father, what an interesting fellow. Your parents were indeed an interesting match. It's hard to come across a pureblood Slytherin who marries a muggle-born Ravenclaw…"_

_Faye was still terribly frightened by the knowledge of this Hat. How did it know about her parents? True they were a strange couple, but they loved each other. Faye was interrupted from her thoughts by the Hat: "Indeed..." The Hat agreed, "But remember child, 'Once a Slytherin, always a Slytherin'." _

_It then continued to think. "You are a lot like your mother, very bright, yes, yes... and very brave as well... perhaps even more so than your mother. Yes, there's only one choice. GRYFFINDOR!" _

Ms. Donovan?" Dumbledore questioned from her obvious lack of response.

Faye snapped back into attention, noticing Albus Dumbledore was standing over by the fireplace, peering at her. "Sorry sir?"

An amused twinkle entered the professors' eyes, only being multiplied by his spectacles.

"I asked if there were any other questions you had?"

"Uh… No sir."

"Very well, if that will be all, I have a meeting with a Mr. Crouch shortly."

"Oh, yes sir," Faye said taking the hint. With that, she headed back over to the fireplace, grabbed a handful of floopowder and throwing it into the flames she shouted, "The Leaky Cauldron!" She was about to step in when Dumbledore spoke once more.

"It **is** really good to see you again, Ms. Donovan. I'm sorry for your loss."

Faye was caught off guard, she stared back at the wise old man, who took this moment of weakness to peer into her memories.

Faye gasped as she felt him explore image after image of her past, giving her the unwelcome chance to relive them again. She was frightened beyond belief when he stopped. What if she couldn't return now? Worse yet, what if he reported her? And then to her utter surprise he said: "See you on the first, Ms. Donovan, and let me be the first to personally welcome you back to Hogwarts." His smile was overly kind and welcoming, making her pause a moment in surprise.

Completely confused and slightly shaken, Faye turned and disappeared through the fireplace.


	4. Diagon Alley

Title: The Heart's a Fickle Thing

Chapter 4: Diagon Alley

Faye Donovan stared blankly at the broomstick that was proudly sitting on display behind the glass window. A gang of loud and high-pitched children suddenly surrounded her, a few accidentally pushing her aside to get a good look at the finely polished and smooth work of art.

It was her last day in Diagon Alley; tomorrow she would be boarding the train to Hogwarts. She had done all her shopping earlier that day and was now wandering around aimlessly, looking into all of the stores with mild interest.

Faye had received another letter from the Headmaster with her school list the night before:

_Ms. Donovan, _

_You will be taking the normal train from Platform 9 3/4. It will leave at exactly eleven o'clock, so be sure not to be late. Upon your arrival, follow the rest of the school back to the carriages, and then travel with the Gryffindors to your appropriate table. I'm sure you are aware of all this, but I felt it necessary to remind you. _

_The other parchment contains a list of all the books you will need. From the information you gave me, it appears that your class selection is as follows: _

_Transfiguration _

_Charms _

_Potions _

_Defense Against the Dark Arts _

_Ancient Runes _

_Arithmancy _

_If anything is amiss, please notify me immediately of any changes that need to be made. _

_Sincerely, _

_Headmaster Albus Dumbledore _

As far as her supplies went, she just had to stop and pick up her new school robes that were currently being altered. However, Madam Malkin said that they would not be ready until around 5 o'clock, on account of all her other orders.

So Faye continued on, passing dozens of smiling faces that she had stared so entranced at the day before. She came to a halt while passing the Magical Menagerie; her gaze was transfixed upon a rather elegant looking cat with very sharp blue eyes (though slightly darker than her own) that shown brightly against its pure black coat. What caught her attention the most was that it was staring right at her. All the other cats that were joined with it in their little pen adjacent to the window seemed uninterested in everything around them, many had taken the opportunity to sleep. Only this one black cat was sitting up, as if waiting for her arrival. At first she thought she had been mistaken, but as she began to move away the cats' eyes followed her every motion.

Astonished, Faye wandered into the shop in search of the owner. It wasn't that hard to find her. A somewhat elderly woman in what Faye guessed was her late fifties was standing behind the circular counter that had been placed in the center of the store. The graying woman was sitting on a rather rough looking stool, shuffling through various papers with deep concentration. Her reading glasses were bobbing slightly with her given movement, glinting every so often when it met the setting sun that was peeking quietly through the window.

Faye Donovan walked carefully over to the woman, so as not to disturb her. Faye chose to stand in front of the counter until she was noticed. However, after two minutes with not even a glance in her direction, Faye decided to help the woman out a bit.

"Pardon me madam?"

The woman's head popped up immediately, a slight look of annoyance met her eye. However, it quickly faded like the drop of a dime when she noticed Faye standing there. The woman smiled earnestly at her, standing from her hunched position.

"Oh, hello dear! What can I do for you?" She asked with such kindness that Faye knew her smile had been sincere.

Faye gave the woman an awkward but real smile, responding in a clear but hesitant tone: "I was actually curious about one of the cats up front…" She pointed to the area for extra emphasis.

The woman followed her finger easily, her face lighting up with the possible prospect of a sale.

"Yes?" She asked, coming out from behind the counter and leading her over to the area. "Which one caught your fancy?"

"The black one, madam." Faye's gaze met the cat's again. It must have turned around earlier, because it was sitting there, waiting patiently when they both approached.

The woman stopped suddenly at this, slightly drooping in stance. " I'm sorry miss, but that cat… it's well… it's not very friendly. I was actually going to have him put down tomorrow morning. He doesn't like anyone; scratches the life out of everyone who tries to so much as touch him.

"I picked him up off the street when he was just a baby. Feisty little thing, but I thought it would wear out of him. That was a year ago… I've got to give up on him sometime."

Faye stared down at this cat, positive that he was well aware of his fate. She wasn't sure how she knew; she just did. It was his last chance; she knew it; he knew it. It was his last chance to get out, and he seemed to be picking her to do that for him. She felt odd, as if she should feel proud. This cat was a smart one; he didn't like to be messed with. Just wanted to be left alone, not petted, not loved, just left be. She felt deeply connected with this cat.

"I'll take him."

The woman simply stared at her, dumbfounded, "Really?"

"How much?"

"Um," the woman had to get her mind back in order, "Two galleons, normally, but I'll give him to you at a good price. Eight sickles sound good?"

Did she think I would change my mind? Nevertheless, I nodded mutely, waiting for her to gather the cat, who seemed rather wary of the woman's arms, but managed to maintain a peaceful nature. The woman took the cat and put him in a good-sized carrying cage. Also upon Faye's request, she went to gather various foods, and then politely placed them into a paper bag.

Faye left the store, the cage held tightly in her left hand, and the bag tucked carefully beneath her right arm. Glancing down at her watch, she noticed it was 5:15, and hurried off towards Madam Malkin's to collect her robes.

When she reached the store, she entered without apprehension, noticing the familiar surroundings she had seen previously that day.

"Oh sweetie!" Madam Malkin, a plump woman in her late twenties exclaimed when she noticed her arrival. "Perfect timing! I was just wrapping up your things."

Faye followed her to the counter, where Malkin continued to finish off packing her new Gryffindor robes into a neat white box, then handed it over to her while cheerfully saying: "That'll be five galleons, please."

She scooped into her wallet and grabbed the sum asked, listening to the jingles of the rest of her money. She had stopped by Gingott's late yesterday to transfer her father's money into a new vault before the Death Eaters got their hands on it. She had wisely decided to grab some spending money before departing.

Faye left the shop and headed back towards the Leaky Cauldron. When she arrived, she headed straight for her room, placing her things and the cage carefully upon the bed. She opened the cage, and pulled the barred-door open for the cat to come out freely. It did, stealthily padding out and stretching quietly, then choosing to take a seat at the edge near her.

Faye simply stared at him for a moment. For a cat, he was very precise in all his movements, and seemed rather human-like in the way he waltzed around.

Faye stared deep into the cat's eyes, and then decisively stated: "I'm going to name you Cahir."


	5. The Reuniting

Chapter 5: The Reuniting

Faye stared up impassively at the scarlet train known as the Hogwarts Express. She remembered standing there four years ago, excited at the promise of a fun year. Those days were long gone, however. She had lost contact with everyone from her previous life as soon as her father hauled her out a few months into her third year.

Cahir gave a light meow, dragging her back to reality. She glanced down silently at the cat, who stared back up intently, as if telling her it was time to board. Faye turned her gaze towards the large clock a little way down on the boarding platform and saw that it was 10:54. Indeed, she should begin to board.

More students and parents were beginning to arrive on the platform. Faye did not glance at anyone unless they were in her direct path of travel. Out of the few students she did see, none of them stood out in her mind as a familiar face. In fact there were only a rare few whose images seemed to spark any sort of memory.

Even though so many years had passed, she was still able to recollect on the five she had labeled as her friends. No matter what her father did to her, those five remained with her in her thoughts, though their faces somewhat diminished over time. She was still able to remember their hair, eyes, and above all the smiles they wore nearly constantly.

Faye's mind wandered briefly to the thought of their smiles. She couldn't remember the last time she really, truly smiled, out of laughter from a funny joke, or even the smile that comes from pure happiness. Her mind was now constantly haunted with the image of her father: dark haired, tall and strong, yet with brown eyes that had remained lifeless for the past four years.

Faye was temporarily brought back to earth by a Ravenclaw student seemingly around her own age. The girl had blonde curly hair and was what some would claim to be quite pretty. She was staring at Faye with a look of pure curiosity and confusion. However, before the girl could even manage to form a sentence, Faye walked swiftly passed her and boarded the train, levitating her belongings along behind her.

Faye continued down the narrow train corridor in search of her refuge. She was nearing the end of the train when a sudden noise startled her.

"James Potter, there is no way that badge is real!"

Faye stopped mid-step, instantly made nervous by the name that was called out.

"Sorry my love, but it's the real deal! Which means you and I will be spending a lot more time together!"

She heard a huff of irritation, and then a girl with auburn hair, green eyes, and a look that could kill was suddenly exiting a nearby compartment and making her way towards her.

Faye stood motionless as the girl brushed passed her with a tiny "pardon me" as she went by. Faye tried very hard to ignore the fact that her former best friend, Lily Evans, did not recognize her. But in all honesty, what could she expect after she disappeared from their lives with no explanation nearly four years ago?

Faye ushered in a quick breath of determination and was about to proceed when yet another person waltzed out of the very same compartment. He was wearing a smirk and there was a twinkle in his hazel eyes, which were set behind round, black glasses. James Potter stood before her with a look of utter delight. Both Lily Evans and James Potter had grown up exponentially over the years, yet at the same time there were nearly identical to their thirteen year old selves. Their bodies were much larger and grown up, yet many of their features, and above all their personalities had remained the same.

James was beginning to walk by her, when he stopped. Backing up a little, he stared at her, his previous happiness was momentarily absent as he looked her over. A look of confusion momentarily graced his face as he asked, "Do I know you?"

Faye was unsure of how to answer this, unsure even if he would remember her if she gave him her name. Faye felt her defenses beginning to break down as she stared at the seventeen year old. Briefly remembering the thirteen-year-old James Potter, as she sat with him, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew, and the grumpy Lily Evans.

"_Lily, come on, he's not that bad!" said a smiling Faye, who still had a small amount of baby fat evident on her cheeks. However, her eyes were just as vibrantly blue as they were to this day, even if they were filled with laughter._

"_You don't understand! He's not mean to you like he is to me!" she said staring at the boy with revulsion as he started an eating contest with his best mate, Sirius._

"_He's not mean to you! He just likes you a lot!" Lily gave her a look of disdain. Faye sighed then said, "Please Lils, let us just get through one meal without you yelling angrily at the poor bloke._

"_Hey Lily, look over here!" Lily turned her head slightly to glance at the scrawny James Potter, just as he sent a spoonful of mashed potatoes flying towards her head. It landed with a splat as it hit her nose, sliding down slowly._

_Lily raised a hand and wiped it vigorously from her face. Getting up, her skin turning the color of an overly-ripe tomato, she pointed her finger at him threateningly as she shouted, "You, James Potter, are the most immature and pig-headed boy I have ever met!" And with that she had gotten up and stalked away, with James shouting after her, "Oh come on Evans, it was only a joke!"_

Faye stared at the boy, whose childish behavior still appeared to be evident on his much better built figure. She was still speechless, when James asked, "Do you talk?"

Faye could not hold back the glare as she swiftly walked passed him in search of a compartment. She tried not to glance into the compartment as she passed, but it was nearly impossible seeing as there was a figure there, getting ready to close the door.

She glances up slightly as she met the grey eyes. She couldn't stop herself from stopping once more, as she stared at her other former best friend. He held the same confused expression, as if he knew he should remember the tall, thin, black haired girl that stood before him. His mouth then fell abruptly. There was silence for a moment as neither of them spoke a word. And then quite suddenly, the tall, muscular figure that was Sirius Black said in shock, "Faye?"

The girl's face remained motionless, as she contemplated the situation. Trying to mask her emotion of relief at the fact she was not completely forgotten, she started at the handsome dark haired boy in somewhat of a daze. He was a lot scrawnier when she had seen him last. His dark hair had also changed, seeming smoother and a lot longer; it fell neatly into his eyes. Out of all her friends, Sirius' face was the one she had remembered the clearest over the years. After another second, she opened her mouth and said in a calm voice, "It's good to see you again, Sirius."

Sirius seemed slightly startled by the girl's sudden appearance, but after a moment of just staring at her, looking her up and down in pure interest, he stepped aside, motioning with his arm for her to enter the compartment. She stared into it with hesitation. She could see both Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew getting up slightly to get a look at her.

"Please come in," Sirius said with sincerity. Faye stared at him for a moment before giving in and walking into the compartment, her trunk and cat gently floating in behind her.

After stowing her trunk, and taking Cahir from his cage and into her arms, Faye took a vacant seat next to Peter Pettigrew who was situated next to the window. Remus Lupin sat across from him, staring up from his book, looking at her in interest. Sirius took the seat next to Lupin, and across from her.

"Who is she?" Faye turned to see that this came from Peter. Out of all her former friends, Peter had changed the least. He was still short and stout, though his voice had become somewhat deeper, there was still the slight squeak present in it.

Lupin still wore the mysterious scars that never gained an explanation from his continually nagging friends. He had bags under his eyes, yet his form was slightly more muscular, and his face more prominent.

"It's Faye," This came from Sirius who sat, staring at her in wonder as she gazed at each of them individually.

"Faye?" Peter asked, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Faye took no interest in him, not caring in the slightest that he forgot about her, out of her five friends Peter was the one she labeled as a friend for the mere fact that he was there, always present in the company of James, Sirius, and Remus. While she never minded the boy, they were never close.

"Faye Donovan," said Remus, noticing the growing anger on Sirius' face, with a small smile he added, "It's good to see you again."

"What happened to you?" this came from Sirius again, staring at her in both curiosity and concern.

Faye stared at him warily for a moment, then glanced down at her black cat, whose dark blue eyes stared back at her fixedly. She turned her gaze back towards Sirius and said simply, "I grew up as most people do. Were you expecting to still see me as the short and chubby girl that I was when I left?"

Sirius didn't even blink at her response, "That's not what I meant." He said, not taking his eyes off her. Faye raised an eyebrow at this, waiting for him to continue, "Why did you leave?"

"My father wished for me to continue my education in a more controlled environment," she stated simply, without a moments hesitation. It was as if she had rehearsed her answer. Sirius stared at her, as if waiting for some sign of the girl he once knew to reemerge.

"Why didn't you write?" Sirius asked, tilting his head to the side, while trying to hold back his anger at the girl's seemingly lack of caring.

Faye's eyes narrowed slightly. She held her ground defiantly, annoyed at the fact that this boy, the one she had missed above everyone else was upset with her about this. She wasn't allowed to send letters to her friends, and she had waited day after day, hoping to see a sign of an owl, to know her friends still cared. But the owls never came. "Why didn't you write?" she returned the question, a bit more forcefully than she maybe should have.

"I did."

Faye's eyes grew at this, momentarily loosing her carefully built wall of protection. She stared at the boy with fascination, as if he was a newly discovered creature, spouting five arms and the head of a goat.

"We all did." Sirius allowed a little bit of his anger to surface as he stared at her. Faye turned away from his intense gaze to stare at Remus, who nodded in confirmation, and then to Peter, who shrugged.

"I- I never received them," Faye stated, trying to regain her composure.

Sirius' gaze softened slightly, "Why did he let you come back? Did your mum get him to loosen up?"

Faye was amazed at their lack of knowledge of her life. She had figured at least a few were now aware of her father's death. She had seen a short article on the front page, dedicated to the Ministry worker's passing, labeling it as natural causes. She had a feeling Albus Dumbledore spoke with a few officials about the incident, since no one came searching for her, declaring her a murderer.

"My mother died shortly after I left Hogwarts, and my father passed on last Friday. I'm here on my own free will," Faye said all this with a face and voice of indifference, slightly shocking her companions.

Sirius was about to speak again, when Remus cut him off, perhaps fearing an inconsiderate question, "We're sorry for your loss."

Faye nodded shortly to them, turning back to Cahir. The others continued to question her shortly after, but she left them with either vague responses or shrugs of indifference at the topic at hand. They seemed rather surprised by her entirely new persona, perhaps even a little intimidated.


	6. The Accident

Chapter 6: The Accident

In the end Faye spent most of the train ride staring out the window, occasional feeling the gaze of a few of her former friends. After all, she knew that she couldn't instantly regain their friendship. Though in all honesty, she was not entirely certain she even wanted to make friends again. She wanted so much to move on and be happy, but she knew she could not do that with the Dark Lord still out there. And the last thing she wanted was to drag anyone into that.

However, she decided to chance a glance at Sirius. He was sitting across from her, reading silently. She couldn't stop a small smile from creeping onto her face. Staring at him made some of the childish feelings that she thought were long gone come rushing back unexpectedly. While her rational side told her to keep a steady head and retain her cold demeanor, the fun and carefree teenager that she thought she had lost with her mother said that she should not be such an emotionally challenged prude.

"I didn't know you could read," Faye said in a slightly teasing tone.

Sirius jumped a little, not expecting the sudden attention. His grey eyes scrutinized her chilling blue orbs. After a quick inspection he noticed her amusement. A grin grew onto his face, "Well a lot can changed in four years!"

Sirius saw her face drop a little at this. His grin faded into a kind smile as he showed her the cover of his book, _The Beater's Bludgeoned Bludger_. "I don't know if you can count this as reading though," he said as he handed her the book to examine.

She took it, flipping through the pages quickly. She shrugged lightly, "Don't be too hard on yourself, there's only about three pictures every five pages or so, and there are some large words in here, such as…" she scanned the current page for an example, "Ah, here we go, 'If there are no nearby bludgers, the next best way to subdue an opponent is to pummel them repeatedly with your club', see he used the words 'subdue' AND 'pummel' that takes talent."

Sirius was about to respond, but a large hiss and a shriek of fright interrupted them.

"What the hell is wrong with that devil cat of yours?" Peter demanded angrily from his new position next to Remus. Peter had managed to squeeze himself onto the opposite corner, much to the annoyance of the other inhabitants. He was caressing his injured hand, were a very large scratch was visible.

Cahir was still gazing at Peter warily, a small amount of fur on her back had been flattened, an obvious sign of unwanted attention.

"You shouldn't have tried to pet him," Faye said, her face emotionless again.

"That's what cat's are there for! To pet!" Peter cried indignantly from his corner.

Faye stared down at Cahir; he was already staring back at her, as if to use her to communicate to Peter. While she did not hear the words, she could understand his concerns from the expression in his eyes. At least, she believed she could understand. In truth, it was probably her own emotions she was conveying.

"Cahir does not enjoy attention. He does not pride himself on being the jolly, fat cat, loved by all. He just wishes to live his life alone. I am sure you would not appreciate someone coming up and patting your head and saying what a good boy you are." Faye stared at Peter for a moment, rethinking her words, "then again perhaps you would."

A light snort could be heard coming from Sirius' direction, and from the corner of her eye she could see a light smile playing on Remus' lips. Yet, all of her attention remained fixed on this one chubby boy of seventeen. It was as if she was sizing up her competition, refusing to let him get the upper hand. Peter was slightly trembling under her gaze, feeling trapped he did what most people do, he used his words.

"Are you trying to describe yourself or something? Are you the one that wants to be left alone? Because that's what it seems like when you keep avoiding all our questions. What did your father beat you or somethi-"

"Peter!" Remus warned, with a strict but quiet tone.

"Oh, come on Remus, you know you are thinking it too!" Peter cried anxiously from his corner.

Feeling like a cat preparing to pounce on her pray, Faye let a tiny hint of a smirk play on her lips. And as she had hoped, Peter quivered slightly from the unexpected expression. One thing her father had always taught her was how to manipulate her enemies.

"Bravo Peter, you clever little mouse you," Peter's eyes widened slightly at this, to which Faye assumed meant that he was surprised to find out he was correct in his analysis. Not that Faye was going to start her confessions anytime soon.

"You're amazing skill of deduction has decided to point to the over assumed path of physical abuse from father dearest, and while my father, may be rest in peace, was not the most loving I can not claim to have ever suffered such an injustice." Faye stated from her position on the opposite bench, alone except for Cahir who was sitting up, watching Peter with the same intensity Faye possessed.

Faye was not all-together lying about the lack of abuse. Her late father never resorted to muggle forms of beating, and even when he used various curses on her; she was always allowed the pleasure of a wand to defend herself. Who was she to declare abuse in such a fair strategy as that?

Peter was now looking back and forth for some sort of answer. Remus and Sirius were both staring at the two transfixed, Faye's cool nature, alone with Peter's panicky facade. Faye no longer felt like the cat advancing on her pray, but rather a snake, preparing to inflict its poison and consume the pesky little mouse whole.

As if sensing this about her, Peter gathered his defense, a cowardly retreat but effective nonetheless.

"How were you able to get back into Gryffindor? Did Dumbledore just let you in without even making you be resorted?" Peter asked frantically. I raised a brow at him curiously. What was he getting at?

"I don't remember a lot about you but I do remember one thing. Your father was a Slytherin, and it looks like you should have been one too. I guess Sirius really is the only exception to the rule!"

Above all else, it was telling her that she was like her father that made Faye react violently. She had survived the last four years by telling herself she was nothing like him, not as cruel, not as devious. However, these past few months she had been fearing that the one thing she was trying so hard to avoid becoming was the one thing that she was turning into.

Furious that someone had pointed out the one thing she had been fearing, Faye quickly whipped out her wand, a flicker of annoyance and anger present in her usually calm and collected eyes. Her mouth was still, rigid even as she wordlessly sent a curse at Peter. The boy started to scream loudly as his once pale skin turned an angry red, blisters erupted over his entire body, some even cracking and oozing blood.

Faye blinked in astonishment. The dark curse she had sent was a favorite of her father, and she had been the victim of it on several occasions. While not as painful as the Cruciatus curse, this particular curse had the added displeasure of lasting for weeks after it is sent, unless of course a counter-curse was employed. It was used on her often as a form of punishment for disobedience.

What truly intrigued her was that originally she had intended to use a simply body bind curse on the stupid boy for his large mouth. Perhaps he was right about her; perhaps she really was turning into her father. He had once been a kind man after all. He started out as a caring husband, and a wonderful father. Who is to say she was not going the same route. For the first time in a long time she felt fear. It was coursing through her body like a non-stop tidal wave, occasionally crashing against her sides and making her jolt every so often with the movement of the train.

It had been less than a minute since she had cast the Devil's curse as she had come to call it, and Peter was still screaming furiously. Remus and Sirius had rushed to his side to try to find a way to reverse it.

Coming over her momentary shock Faye pushed the two aside and thought the counter-curse while she pointed her wand at Peter. The angry blisters disappeared immediately, and Peter's cries diminished into faint whimpers. He remained there shaking and panting. Faye backed away as the trembling boy curled up in fear and refused to look at her.

"I think you should go."

Faye looked up to see that it was Sirius who had spoken. The first thing he had said since the start of the argument. Without saying a single word Faye levitated her items and stalked out of the room, Cahir following closely behind her.


End file.
